9.15.2013

Be Impeccable With Your Word



Our Four Agreements book club begins with the first agreement: be impeccable with your word. Don Miguel Ruiz's bestselling book has been a complete inspiration in my life. The agreements are not easy to live by all the time, but, for me, that is the fun in life— waking up, seeing where the day takes you, being open and curious and always doing your best.

This week's video discusses the first agreement, Be Impeccable With Your Word. My videos will discuss my personal journey with each agreement and each blog post will share favorite quotes from the chapter and my interpretation of the quotes. If you are unable to see the video above, click here, look in the sidebar of this blog, or check out my channel: www.youtube.com/TheDailyConnoisseur .

The following are some of my favorite quotes from this chapter. The quotes from the book are in italics and my commentary is below each quote:

Why your word? Your word is the power that you have to create. p. 26

This is so true! Your word is very powerful. More powerful than you could ever imagine. It makes sense to become mindful about the words you are speaking, writing and thinking.

It is through your word that you manifest everything. p. 26

I firmly agree that your intent is manifested through your word. It is the vehicle we use to communicate but also the vehicle we use to manifest and most of us do not realize this.

Being impeccable with your word is not using the word against yourself. p. 32

In order to stop the pattern of self-sabotage you must change the way you speak and think about yourself. Question any negative thoughts you have about yourself and change them to loving thoughts.

Being impeccable with your word is the correct use of your energy; it means to use your energy in the direction of truth and love for yourself. p. 32

When people speak negatively, they think they are only hurting others, but really they are hurting themselves. They are not making correct use of their energy.

The truth is the most important part of being impeccable with your word. p. 37

Don Miguel Ruiz goes on later to write that people lie because they are afraid. They are afraid that others will find out they are not perfect. Ridding yourself of this fear, the need to present a perfect facade and the need to people please will give you infinite freedom.

Impeccability of the word can lead you to personal freedom, to huge success and abundance; it can take away all fear and transform it into joy and love. p.45

This is kind of like the ten-item wardrobe. Bear with me on this one. With the ten-item wardrobe, you first have to clear all of the clutter from your closet. All of the clothes that don't suit you; that don't speak to who you truly are. You must do the same thing with your word. You need to cull your words and thoughts and throw out anything that doesn't work with who you are now. A very liberating experience!

Here is our active challenge for the week: notice what words you think and speak. Are the majority negative or positive?

Please watch this week's video for a more in depth discussion on the topic.

I would love to hear your thoughts on being impeccable with your word. Please write in the comments, tweet me, facebook me or blog/ vlog about it. I want to hear from you!

Next week we will discuss the second agreement: don't take anything personally. See you then!



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16 comments:

Ann R. said...

Thank you for sharing your comments about this book. I had tried reading it before, but couldn't get through it. I would read a sentence or two to glean some insights but none of the thoughts would resonate with me. So I stopped reading. Perhaps after your discussion, I can pick the book up, again, and be in a different mindset. Maybe, now, I am ready to 'see' things in a different way! Thank you. I think the book conversation is a great idea!

Claire said...

This first agreement means different things in different stage of my life. Back before I have children, I read this book and for me it meant to speak up for myself. Many of us women, for example, can relate that we are not to say things that are not agreeable in the workplace. I found, esp for myself, that being agreeable was more important than speaking up. By not speaking up, I was not impeccable with my words, and thus there was no freedom. Speaking up, in the direction of truth and love, freed me from other people's expectation and opened myself up to many possibilities (e.g. now my boss saw my point of view, perhaps he/she might think differently about some subjects, etc.). Now that I have a child, this first agreement reminds me to be more mindful of what I say and my intention behind it -- just like you mentioned. My child will learn from my action and being impeccable with my words mean I mean what I speak and I speak in the direction of truth and love. All of us moms can relate to this in terms of discipline/teaching your children, not just for the sake of punishing/being angry/lashing out of the situation, but for the true purpose of love, safety and wellbeing of your children.

Greenjane72 said...

Oh no! Time has flown and I haven't read it yet. Will remedy that immediately. Am trying to (calmly) organise a birthday party for my 2 little girls. In doing so I've been reflecting on each of them (turning 1 and 5). I also am a psychologist who specialises in work with people with eating disorders and this also makes me think about how we are raising girls (and boys for that matter). You do indeed create with your word but also with your actions, what you choose to read, watch, follow online etc. All of this is absorbed by you and has an impact on how you think and feel, the 'lies' you carry around which all in turn impacts on what you project to others in speech and actions. A very important thing to consider on many levels but I'm particularly thinking at the moment about the impact what I say (and do) will have on my daughters. I say be impeccable with your word AND actions and what you choose to absorb in your life. Make any sense?

minniedog said...

Hi Jennifer, I just love love love everything about you. You are the person I long to be. There is one great quote that always sticks in my mind and I think is quite apt to this weeks video....."There is greater strength in silence". Its far too easy to shout & rant, fly off the handle, but much harder to stay silent & bite your tounge. Keep up the amazing work. xxx

novelist said...

As I read/pushed past the point that I felt like putting the book down, some of the ideas began to resonate with me: the idea that we are a combination of words that were said to us growing up and how we think about ourselves now, especially. Jennifer the 10 item wardrobe is a good analogy as far as getting rid of that which isn't true for us or about us now. For me, the book definitely has some food for thought.--
Laurie D/rosesread

Faun Vandergriff said...

I have a question about the First Agreement - how do you maintain discreetness/privacy and still remain impeccable in your words?

For example, I have coworkers who ask me direct questions about my personal life that I would prefer not to answer, because I'm a private person. How can I maintain civility and discretion without answering questions directly?

The McMeekins said...
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Dinorah Castaneda said...

I love this book, have read it several times and give several copies as gifts. For me being impecable with your word means really believing what you say every day and don't let loud people change your mind just because you want them to shut up. Stand up for what you believe and put ut in words

Sue obryan said...

This chapter brought a new depth to my awareness of what "Word" means in my own faith tradition (Catholic). At the same time it brought to light evidence that spiritual truth transcends religious boundaries. Being impeccable with my word has been a challenge for me in my own life, for various reasons, but I always thought I "had" to lie in certain situations, when now I understand that by lying I was actually directly hurting myself! I appreciated the discussion of what it means to sin (self rejection), which was another new layer of understanding for me. On the topic of gossip, I wonder how it looks to be impeccable with your word amongst chronic gossipers, especially if they are family members, rather than friends of one's own choosing. Great chapter, I will read it again before going to the next.

Sheree said...

Sometimes I scold myself to motivate myself to do better. But this is a mistake as you are saying. Being kind to myself seems a little spoiled but really it is better for everyone else around me.

Unknown said...
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Aldona Ɓukaszewicz said...

http://www.ted.com/talks/shawn_achor_the_happy_secret_to_better_work.html
It is about something similar

Charlene said...

I read this book about a year ago and your post today was a nice refresher course for me. I'll re-read it before you get to the second agreement. This first agreement is such a challenge. To be constantly aware of what you say and how you say it isn't easy. Our words can do so much damage or be so uplifting to those around us (including ourselves). It's certainly worth the effort to be impeccable even though it may be difficult. Thanks for your comments. I look forward to the rest of this "book club".

The Daily Connoisseur said...

I have really enjoyed reading your experience with this first agreement. There is so much to this that I didn't even touch. I've really loved reading your comments and sharing this experience with you. See you tomorrow when we discuss Don't Take Anything Personally!

Jennifer x

Jomara Carvalho Ribeiro said...

Thank you for recommending this illuminated book. I really appreciated your comments and I´m attempting to follow the commitments! This first one has been very tough for me, indeed.

Emma Knight Peel said...

This is definitely the most difficult agreement for me! I can't wait to see how my life changes after I keep practicing all four agreements, though. :)

 
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