We are kicking off the Life at Home series on The Daily Connoisseur this week with this first installment: Cut the Distractions. Living well at home is very important. It's important because how you live at home behind closed doors when no one is looking is indicative of your true self and your true values.

We strive to make changes to our life in the areas of style, makeup, wardrobe, clutter, being in the present moment, presenting ourselves well, etc. and if we are serious about making these changes, we need to get serious about implementing them at home.

In At Home With Madame Chic we discuss how a happy home life sets you up for success in the outside world. Order is needed at home. Organization is needed at home. Beauty is needed at home. Dignity is needed at home. The arts are needed at home. Style is needed at home. But are we able to live well at home if we find ourselves constantly distracted? In our minds we know what we should be doing but when we will actually get around to doing that? We're not sure. Right now we're surfing the internet, or binge-watching a reality TV show, or deep into reading Facebook posts.

You'd like to cook that healthy meal. You'd like to get some patio gardening done. You'd like to write that letter. You'd like to practice the piano. You'd like to organize your lingerie drawer. You'd like to read that historical biography. You'd like to write in your journal. You'd like to tidy up the kitchen and you will... just after you spend an hour perusing the online shops.

Sound familiar?

It certainly does to me! Screens- whether television, smartphone or laptop can be a major distraction and if we want to live well at home, we need to cut the distraction. This doesn't mean cutting these things out entirely. But it does mean getting strict about how much time you devote to them.

Check out this week's video for the rest of my thoughts on this subject. If you cannot see the video above, click here, look in the sidebar of this blog, or visit my channel: www.youtube.com/TheDailyConnoisseur

I'd love for you to join in on this discussion. What are your distractions at home? How could you be spending your time instead? On social media use the hashtags #LifeAtHome #MADAMECHIC

News
I will be part of a live red carpet commentary for The Critic's Choice awards this Thursday, January 15th from 4pm to 6pm on MakerTV. You can watch the entire viewing party here or visit http://www.maker.tv/live/criticschoice

Ruby's Musings just adores Madame Chic for French Girl Friday

MoonFireGypsyWagon muses on At Home With Madame Chic in her latest blogpost.


Madame Chic Inspiring Thought
If you have extra time this week, don't spend it on the internet (even if that means shutting down this blog right now!), but try something that enriches your soul: play the piano, write a poem, get some gardening done, make a cake, write a letter, arrange some flowers. Feel invigorated by your freedom from the screen.


Testimonial

Patricia W. from Connecticut writes:

Jennifer, I've been following your blog for a while now and love it. Love your videos. And yes, I'm adhering to your 10-item capsule wardrobe. It's so much easier and stylish with regard to ease of deciding what to wear. Almost everything in my closet works with everything else so no problem. My closet is now a streamlined and pretty personal space...one I'm happy to show to my girlfriends as an inspiration. The best news is Lessons from Madame Chic inspired me to put my best self forward even if I'm just doing errands or going to the supermarket. I feel so much better knowing I look presentable and need never again feel embarrassed upon meeting an acquaintance or neighbor while out and about.

One of the very best compliments I've received as a result was from the mother of a good friend, Whenever I see you, Patricia, you always look so...so...clean and shiny.

I was drawn into your video blogs not only by their content, but also, almost immediately, by the fact that I'd find myself smiling whenever I heard your intro, ... Jennifer here.

Patricia W

Thank you Patricia. You have been a long-time reader and supporter of my blog. I appreciate your testimonial!

See you next week!


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I am starting a new on-going series on the Daily Connoisseur on the subject of self-discipline. A while back I wrote a post on Facebook that discussed the subject of self-discipline and spending. For many of us (myself included!) there is a lack of self-discipline, particularly in this area of our lives. We justify purchases even though they are unnecessary. Many times we do this to fill a void. Well, the facebook post really hit a nerve because so many people responded and said they struggled with this very thing.

I am no different from you. I lack self-discipline in certain areas of my life too. But as I always say, awareness is the first step toward change. If we become aware of our shortcomings, this awareness leads to action. The action steps we take often prove challenging. But who doesn't love a good old-fashioned challenge?

In this week's video, I tell you the story of my old, but trusty, blender. I've had this blender for ages and it works fine (a little slow... but fine). Suddenly when I see a picture of a really expensive, high-end blender in the glossy pages of a kitchen catalogue, I find myself considering a major purchase that I wouldn't normally have considered.

Listen to how the voice in your head tries to talk you into things. The justifications are hilarious. Now I'm not suggesting we never upgrade or go shopping. The economy would grind to a halt! But I am suggesting that we don't give in to instant gratification. I state in my video, Investment Shopping 101, we tend to not appreciate the things we buy and instantly set our sites to what we can acquire next. What does it hurt to sit with what we have and then make a responsible decision before making a high-quality purchase?

When my little blender that could eventually dies, I most likely will upgrade and get a fancy, high-end blender. But until that day happens I will cultivate self-discipline and just wait a little longer for my smoothies to be blended. After all... patience is a virtue.

If you are unable to see the video above, click here, look in the sidebar of this blog, or visit my channel: www.youtube.com/TheDailyConnoisseur

Madame Chic Inspiring Thought
Take time today to appreciate the things you already own. Cultivate gratitude for everything from your toaster to the pillow on your bed. Notice your need for instant gratification and how often it shows up. Take the time to cultivate the art of patience.

News
At Home with Madame Chic is coming out one month early! The new publication date is October 7, 2014.

Check out my newly revamped author website at www.jenniferlscott.com

Admin
I have emailed all of the winners of the book giveaways this summer. Nearly everyone has responded but some have not. If you see your name listed as one of the winners on the rafflecopter widgets but have not had correspondence with me, please email me so you can receive your prize. Please state your name and email and the book which you won. Only 2 have not responded. Cathy C. from the Secrets of the Lighthouse giveaway, your email has bounced back. Thank you all for your participation in the book giveaway series! There will be many more to come.

This week I would love to know... what are your struggles with self-discipline? Do you have any requests for future posts in this series?

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Happy New Year 2014!

I hope you had a great holiday with your loved ones. I had such a wonderful break. I got a much needed rest and caught up with so many family members I haven't seen the whole year. It was truly fabulous.

In January 2013 we talked about the tipping point to changing how we live. No longer content with the status quo, we have gone searching for a path in life that is teeming with light and that brings us closer to who we really are.

Continuing on this path, my New Year's message to you is simple. I am focusing on this philosophy this entire year and I hope that you join in with me:

It's not what you do, but how you do it.

I'll repeat that again...

It's now what you do, but how you do it.

It's a concept that is explored in Lessons from Madame Chic, one that I will continue to explore on this blog and one that is even further discussed in my new book that will be out at the end of this year.

It's not what you do, but how you do it.

This year let's set aside the negative thinking, let's work on ourselves from the inside out and let's enjoy what we're doing, no matter what it is we are, in fact, doing. Let's change our perceptions and most important, LET'S HAVE FUN!

If you are unable to see the video above, click here, look in the sidebar of this blog, or check out my channel: www.youtube.com/TheDailyConnoisseur

Thank you for joining me this year on the Daily Connoisseur. I just know it's going to be a great year...

Notes

♚ Thank you for all of your messages! I get dozens of reader messages a day and am not always able to respond. I read and appreciate every single one. Thank you, thank you, thank YOU!

♚ We will be starting our Untethered Soul book club in February. Be sure to pick up or check out a copy so you can join in on the discussion.

News

I am featured in France's L'Express newspaper, in an article about the feminine ideal of American women. The article is in French, but you can likely translate it via google translate.

Testimonials

Agnieszka from Poland writes of Lessons from Madame Chic:

I really recommend that book. It is one of the best books I have ever read. It is amazing and it makes my life better. Thank you:) Greetings from Poland :)

Thank you Agnieszka ♥︎

Please send me your testimonials for either my book or blog. I would love to publish your comment on the Daily Connoisseur.

See you next week :)

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In this week's video, Ten-Item Wardrobe Follow Up, I answer questions such as: Do I really wear those clothes everyday? and What do I do with clothes from prior seasons?

If you are unable to see the video above, click here, look in the sidebar of this blog, or visit my channel: www.youtube.com/TheDailyConnoisseur

In this post I also thought it would be fun to share my favorite YouTube channels with you. Some of you might already be familiar with these channels, but for many, I know they will be a new treat.

Sara Sabaté

Sara Sabaté is a beauty blogger who does videos in both French and Spanish (sorry, no English!). Her hair and makeup tutorials (her chignon series are my favorite) are so informative and inspiring. You can usually follow the steps even if you don't understand what she is saying.

Here is one of my favorite videos of hers called Chignon diva 60s:



Visit her YouTube channel for more lovely tutorials.

Lisa Eldridge

Lisa Eldridge is a British makeup artist who has the most amazing YouTube channel for makeup lovers. She has such a lovely, soothing way about her (you'll see what I mean when you watch her videos) and her makeup tips are very achievable for us non-professionals. Check out her makeup tutorials on her YouTube channel.

Here is one of my favorites (surprise, surprise) 'No Make-Up' Make-up



The Hungry Planet
I ran across an article in the Daily Mail this past weekend called 'The Great Global Food Gap'. It showcased pictures from the book, The Hungry Planet, by Peter Menzel and shows portraits of families from all around the world surrounded by what they eat in a week. I was so intrigued by these photos (note the families from poorer countries eat more healthfully with more fruits and vegetables and little to no processed foods). After reading this article, I ordered The Hungry Planet and Material World: A Global Family Portrait, both by Peter Menzel.

Learning how other people live and eat has always fascinated me. I am really looking forward to reading both of these books to see if I am inspired to make changes in my own life. I'll keep you updated.

Have a wonderful week!

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One of the most heavily requested videos I get is, how do we care for ourselves as busy moms? I'm right in the thick of it, as you know, with a baby and a toddler. With regard to self care during this time I am certainly learning a lot. I've learned that I have to take a holistic approach to caring for myself and that it's the small moments and simple pleasures that really matter.

I'm learning along with all of you and I have so much to say! (You'll note that this week's video is 7 minutes long.) Even when we do our best to take care of ourselves things don't always go our way. I've spent the last ten days battling the most miserable cold (so much for my spring break!). Everyday I adapt. I've gone to bed at 7:30pm, cancelled social engagements and finally went to the doctor.

When I am used to being busy and on top of everything I get in denial when I'm not well and need to step back and take a break. Thanks to all of you on twitter and facebook for your marvelous health advice and for following my progress :)

Watch this week's video to hear how I get through my day with care and style. (And truly this video is not just for busy moms but all of us, really, who would like to find balance in life.) If you are unable to see the embedded video, click here, look in the sidebar of this blog, or visit my channel: www.youtube.com/TheDailyConnoisseur.

This week I would love to know... how do you care for yourself?

News

♥ Marilyn of Two Frugal Fairfielders reviews Lessons from Madame Chic. She says it's "one of the best little books I've ever read".

♥ Marla Malcolm Beck, co-founder of Bluemercury, reviewed Lessons from Madame Chic on her blog and even tried out le no makeup look for herself!

♥ My interview last Wednesday with Cindy Laverty on Women 4 Women Network radio did not air due to technical difficulties, but it will air this Wednesday, April 10th at 10am PST. Visit www.W4WN.com or click here to listen to our interview where we discuss how we can CARE for ourselves as busy women.

♥ This Wednesday evening, April 10th, I'll be a guest on Bill Leff's late night radio show on WGN Chicago (radio 720). Check out his website for more details.

♥ Because of my cold I have not yet shot my spring ten-item wardrobe video. It's coming soon, I promise. You've probably already noticed some new pieces I'm wearing in my videos... it's coming! Next week will discuss looking presentable while raising small children. See you then!

♥ And finally, I would like to dedicate this blog post to Roger Ebert, the legendary film critic who passed away last week. I grew up watching Siskel and Ebert's weekly show. Their intelligent, yet approachable reviews got the entire nation excited to become film connoisseurs. If I was ever curious about a movie, I would always go to Roger Ebert's website first to see what he had to say. I'm a bit at a loss as to what I'll do now. He will be greatly missed.


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Since the last Reader Questions Answered post I have received so many questions for the series. I love to hear from you and enjoy doing these videos. Part of me feels a bit intimidated by answering your questions... but everything I do stems from a curiosity on how to live well, and that is how I approach each answer. I always enjoy when you comment and give your own take on these subjects so we can learn from each other!

This installment of Reader Q&A covers capsule wardrobe, dealing with anxiety, orchid food (yes I got all of your orchid related queries!) and French films. Oh la la!

If you are unable to see the video above, click here, look in the sidebar of this blog, or visit my channel: www.youtube.com/TheDailyConnoisseur

Testimonial

This testimonial comes from the Guestbook on my author website. It is written by Tammy, who says:

Hi, Jennifer!
I ordered your book on Kindle three days ago, and finished it yesterday. With your book as a guide, I promptly organized my wardrobe, as I had been in a fashion rut for awhile. I found that I did not even like or wear over 90% of my clothes, many of which were relics from my college days (and I graduated six years ago!), some were even from high school. Remained were the few very flattering pieces made of good materials that I seldom wore because they were “saved” for more “worthy” events, which doesn’t even make any sense to me now. I also used your guide at Saks yesterday to pick up a few key pieces that were lacking in my wardrobe. I now have, literally, only 10 pieces, and they all make me look great and feel great! I don’t think I have felt this happy and free in years, if ever. Thank you!

Thank you Tammy!

Next week will show part two of this video... see you then! x

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The luxurious bubble bath you received as a gift for your birthday. Your great-grandmother's china. Those cloth napkins your mother gave you for Christmas. Your nice day shoes. That fabulous wrap dress you bought last year. Do you use your best things on a daily basis?

If not... why?

Our subconscious tries to talk us out of using our best on a daily basis. So many of us have a scarcity mentality where we think if we use our best, we'll use it up and we won't have anything nice in the 'future'. This happens to me all the time, but when I think like this I have started to question myself.

This week's video discusses chapter 10 in Lessons from Madame Chic, Always Use the Best Things You Have. If you are unable to see the above video, click here, look in the sidebar of this blog, or visit my channel: www.youtube.com/TheDailyConnoisseur

I would love to hear your thoughts on using your best. Do you struggle with this? Or is it becoming second nature for you?

See you Thursday when I announce the winner for the Ashenden Giveaway!

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Before we begin, I want to extend my prayers and love to everyone affected by Hurricane Sandy. May you and your loved ones stay safe...

How to Deal With Intimidating Situations

You are equal to any situation you encounter.

Oftentimes we think we might not be worthy or good enough for a situation. We might think people are judging us or that we are not qualified. That is why I love this quote from Marlene Dietrich so much. It reminds us that we are equal to any situation, that we are enough.

Glamour is assurance. It is a kind of knowing that you are all right in every way, mentally and physically and in appearance and that, whatever the occasion or the situation, you are equal to it. —Marlene Dietrich

At first glance, the quote seems to be about glamour, but really it's about so much more than that. It's about empowerment. And it's great advice to take for dealing with intimidating situations.

Watch my video to see why this is one of my favorite quotes, and how you can make it work for you. If you are unable to see the embedded video, click here, look in the sidebar of this blog, or visit my channel: www.youtube.com/TheDailyConnoisseur

This week I would love to know... how do you deal (or not deal) with intimidating situations?

And in other news...

This past week I wrote an article for Tips on Life and Love called, 5 Essential Pieces for The Perfect Fall Wardrobe. I hope you enjoy my picks!

Book News

Lessons from Madame Chic comes out next Tuesday! To lead up to the celebration, there are giveaways taking place on the following blogs this week: The Simply Luxurious Life (thank you, Shannon, for the lovely article too!), Classic + Glam blog and Polly-Vous Français.

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Happy new year everyone! I hope you had a great holiday with your families.

I had a refreshing week and a half off although I wouldn’t call it relaxing. I spent the majority of my time de-cluttering. Just like in spring when the spring cleaning bug hits, new year has always been a time where I’ve felt compelled to tackle the clutter hotspots that have formed in my home.

I like to think I keep a relatively clutter-free home but I realize that a clutter-free home doesn’t maintain itself and requires constant upkeep. I found that clutter was forming in the most peculiar places. For example, the mantle on our fireplace was becoming a gathering place for everything from children’s books, to magazines, to photo albums, to golf balls (don’t ask). Clutter was also forming behind the armchair in our living room (I warned you it was forming in the strangest places). A large indoor putting green my husband purchased was folded behind the chair along with various parts that belong to a baby playpen. These things had been sitting there for months! Surely there was a better place for them…

And there is. I’ve found more appropriate places to keep these various things (putting green is now in the garage, children’s books on the book shelf, photo albums in our trunk, etc.)

Even clearing these minor clutter hotspots gives me a strong sense of accomplishment. I actually take joy out of doing it! Now I need to channel that joy and tackle our home office…

As a word of advice if you have a large de-cluttering task in front of you, may I suggest you only tackle one clutter hotspot a day? Doing so will keep you motivated and not overwhelm you. It is very easy to burn out on de-cluttering if you become inundated with piles to sort through. So tackle one drawer at a time, one hotspot at a time...

Along with clearing the clutter in our homes now is a great time to assess our belongings and only use the best things we have. Doing so can also help to clear the clutter. I discuss the concept of only using our best in the above video. If you are unable to see the video click here, look in the sidebar of this blog or visit my channel: www.youtube.com/TheDailyConnoisseur

Blog and Book News:

Over the holidays my book, Lessons from Madame Chic, was mentioned on four really great blogs. Rayna at Bright Copper Kettles, Joanne at Daily Joy, Michelle at Italiagal and Michal at A Renaissance Girl all have great things to say about Madame Chic! Check out their fabulous blogs to read their mentions and reviews.

Also The Daily Connoisseur was honored with the Versatile Blogger award by food bloggers Sandra and Kathy at Sandra & Kathy's Corners. Thank you ladies!


So until next time... I would love to know… what is the state of clutter in your home? Any hot spots?



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I’ve been getting a lot of emails from readers lately that all have something in common- they are happy to have found an online community of people (us!) that share their quest to lead a more refined and elegant life.

We are a dying breed after all. We believe in etiquette, manners, traditions, and formalities. We want only quality in our lives- from our experiences to the things we possess. We are not interested in the rat race or keeping up with the Joneses. We are interested in taking pleasure in the small things, in clearing out the clutter of our lives and evolving each day. We want to not just exist, but to thrive.

I am so grateful to be a part of this community with you on The Daily Connoisseur where we can explore the very intricacies of these things together. Thank you for all of your emails, comments, tweets and postings- I read every single one.

And thank you to so many of you that have read Lessons from Madame Chic and who have told me how much you love the book and the lessons learned. If you’ve enjoyed the book, please share your experience with others by posting a review on Amazon or Barnes and Noble. Doing so will help to spread the word and increase the online community of people who ‘get it’. ☺

Sending love from Santa Monica,

Jennifer x



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This post comes by request from MikaCake, who asks for advice on how to deal with stress.

Stress is a problem in most of our lives. It can show up in various forms: financial stress, stress from relationships, stress from work, stress from lack of sleep, stress from a cluttered home, stress from a cluttered mind…

How we deal with stress is incredibly important. The whole principle behind this blog is how to live well. It is what I have devoted my life to researching and it is something I am passionate about. I honestly do not believe you can live well if you suffer from stress.

The following are ways that I combat stress, and my advice on how you can too:

Classical Music
Classical music works wonders for the psyche. I listen to it everyday- while I have breakfast, when I’m feeding the baby, when I drive, when I write. It is not the only kind of music I listen to but it is the only kind that affects me on a deeper level, keeps me calm and manages my stress levels. I find the more I listen to classical music and the more I explore it, the more I enjoy it. I like all of the usual favorites such as Debussy’s Claire de Lune (a wonderful song if you’re in the need of being pacified) but I am becoming a connoisseur of some of the lesser known songs as well (As I write this I’m listening to Sonata in A Major for violin and piano by Cesar Franck). And as I’ve mentioned before, my favorite composer is Chopin. If classical music isn’t your cup of tea, listen to whatever it is that soothes your soul and moves you. Hopefully whatever stressful things in your life will (at least temporarily) melt away…

Here are a few of my favorite classical music albums:

The Most Essential Classical Music for your Baby. Don't laugh. This album is beyond spectacular and not just for babies. In fact, I don't even know why they say this is for babies. This has a wide selection of beautiful songs in excellent arrangements. It is a tremendous value as it has 49 songs for only $9.99 What a collection! Suffice to say my baby loves it and so do I.

Tails of the City by The San Fransisco Saxophone Quartet I know what you're thinking... a saxophone quartet? This album is so refreshing and melodious. Who knew that four saxophones could create such stirring renditions of the classics. Have this playing at a dinner party and your guests will be perplexed- in a good way.

The Match Point Soundtrack Woody Allen's Match Point is one of my favorite films of the last decade and the soundtrack is stellar. If you are not already an opera lover you will be after listening to this incredible compilation of music.

Yo-Yo Ma's La Voix du Violoncelle This is an unusual album- very beautiful and haunting. Yo-Yo Ma is a revelation.

Now back to stress combating tactics...


Playing an Instrument
Mine is the piano. Yours could be the violin or the guitar. I even have a friend that plays the harp. Playing a musical instrument is incredibly beneficial for stress. If you don’t already know one, learn one. Many of us played instruments as children, why not pick it up again as an adult? I often find myself sitting down at the piano for Sherlock Holmesian sessions where I go through my (small) repertoire of music. It de-stresses me every time and places my mind in a tranquil state. I try to play a little every day. When you sit down at an instrument the sheer task of focusing and creating music is enough to keep the most stubborn of stresses at bay.

The Tea and Coffee Break
The mere chink of cups and saucers tunes the mind to happy repose.
~George Gissing

I adore this quote- and it’s so true! Make your tea or coffee break tranquil and special to manage stress levels. Seek out specialty teas and coffees to appease your palate when you are feeling overwhelmed. Create a daily ritual where you sit quietly, use your best china or a special mug (I’m loving my commemorative Royal Wedding bone china tanker at the moment- yes I have it and I’m not embarrassed to admit it!). Put away your blackberry- turn off the TV or move away from your computer. Sit with a book or the weekend newspaper you didn’t get to read yet or if your mind really feels on overdrive don’t read at all- Sit in your favorite chair or by the window with the best view, just focus on your steaming cup and tune your mind to happy repose.

Go Slowly and Mindfully
I used to rush around- it didn’t matter where I was going- I was in a rush! One day I found myself in the grocery store, quickly dropping items in my cart, then stressed out that the line to pay wasn’t moving fast enough. Luckily I caught myself. What was I so stressed out for? Where was I rushing off to? It was almost as if the mere act of picking out groceries wasn’t worth my time so I was in a hurry to move on to some future project- some better thing. I had to remind myself in that moment that the only time is now. Now I try , no matter what I’m doing, to do it mindfully- to move slowly and with purpose. Eliminating the false pretense that whatever the future holds is better than what you are currently doing is a powerful way to eliminate stress.

Meditation
My meditation practice is very personal to me, but since Mikacake specifically asked about it here it is… I like to sit still with my eyes closed for a minimum of five minutes every night. During this time I just breathe and think thoughts of gratitude. It can be a very positive and moving experience. I also find it helps me put whatever is stressing me out into perspective…

These are the techniques I most frequently employ to deal with day to day stress. I would love to know… what are yours?

Be sure to watch this week's video where I give a review of my Kindle. See the video by clicking here , looking in the sidebar of this blog, or by visiting: www.youtube.com/TheDailyConnoisseur




The Winged Feline pictured above is in Bronze and dates back to 700 - 575 B.C., Spain. She can be found at the Getty Villa in Malibu.

Last week’s post Clutter-Free Home Part 1 received a great response. I got emails and comments from many of you who are dealing with issues of clutter. It seems many of us have the same issue. We have general control over the whole house but there are one or two areas that are our Achilles heel- the home office (mine), the dining room table or various cluttered drawers or storage spaces.

The good news is this is all manageable. I actually wrote last week’s post a few months ago and have since been trying out various techniques that Famille Chic employed in order to keep the clutter at bay. I am happy to report that slowly but surely these systems are working. Here are some of my thoughts:

What Constitutes Clutter?
Some of you brought up the concern that a home should not be stripped bare of character in the pursuit of banning clutter and I couldn’t agree more! I am not talking here about collectibles or treasured items. One definition of clutter is anything in your home that you don’t absolutely love.

Perhaps you received a housewarming gift from your well meaning neighbor, Gladys- a porcelain statue of a frog, let's just say. You don’t actually like the frog statue and it certainly doesn't go with your modern Zen decor, but you hesitate to get rid of it so as not to hurt dear Gladys's feelings. You decide to store it in your coat closet. Every time you open your coat closet you see the frog and feel feelings of guilt and irritation. That is clutter. (Honestly, this frog analogy is a bit bizarre, but hopefully you see my point).

Clutter is also an accumulation of miscellaneous things that do not belong where they currently are. Keys, cell phone and wallet in the middle of the dining room table are one example. Or a pile of unsorted mail on the piano is another example. Generally your gut can tell you what clutter is. You know deep down because to look at it aggravates you.

Go slowly
Once you decide where your pockets of clutter exist, it is time to tackle them. As with clearing out your wardrobe go slowly and do not take on more than you can handle in a given session. There is nothing worse than having lofty ambitions, pulling out the contents of an entire closet and realizing a half hour later you would like to be done for the day and go to lunch but have only sifted through 1/3 of your mess. Be realistic and realize that accomplishing one small task a day (be it one junk drawer, one pile of filing or one section of the closet) can boost morale and keep you enthusiastic about tackling the next day’s task.

Other People
Of course from a clutter stand point it would be a lot easier if we just lived alone and followed our own clutter management system. But then we might get lonely and life would be no fun. So we need to figure out a way to coexist harmoniously with our husbands or wives, children, pets or roommates without becoming a clutter-controlling tyrant.

As I have mentioned before I believe Famille Chic (and my Californian French friends) had the entire household on board with keeping the clutter at bay. It was not just the women concerned with the issue of keeping a tidy and orderly home- it was the men too. The men seemed particularly respectful of keeping their things in the proper place. So how does one ‘train’ members of the family without coming across as bossy, neurotic or a nag? Asking nicely, gentle reminders and subtle interventions are needed here. Saying things such as, Honey could you try to not be such a slob? don't work (trust me, I say this from experience). If asking nicely and gentle reminders do not work perhaps a sit down meeting is in order. If possible provide a cup of tea and a slice of cake at said meeting- anything to make the new system seem more enjoyable to the trainee.

I recently tackled our hall closet. Here are my notes:

Our hall closet was horribly stuffed. There were so many coats and jackets hanging in there, if a guest came over, there wasn’t room for their coat! So the guest’s coat and handbag would inevitably go on the back of a dining room chair- not a good look. Especially if they are over to dine and then you need to find a space for their coat once everyone goes to the table. The whole situation bothered me. I would dream about having someone over, asking if I could take their coat, and hanging it neatly in the hall closet. But in reality if I did that and opened the door, there was a very good chance that tennis rackets, umbrellas and other miscellaneous objects would fly out- embarrassing us all.

The hall closet should have only the coat you will wear that day. Since it’s just me and my husband (baby doesn’t hang her coats yet), there should only be two coats hanging and around 4 padded or wooden hangers for our guest’s coats.

Same with shoes. We were using our hall closet to store every shoe we’ve ever owned. There were so many shoes, they were piled on top of the vacuum cleaner (it is necessary for us to store our vacuum cleaner in the hall closet)- so every week when the housekeeper pulled out the vacuum, she would scream (and probably silently curse me) when a pile of excess shoes jumped out at her.

I ended up pulling everything out of the closet and as you can probably guess, a lot of it was headed for the trash can or charity bin. I found old travel pillows, receipts, 10 year old Ugg boots (!) and exercise equipment we’ve never used!

We can hold on to so much stuff- much of it we no longer want or will never use. And when you live in a condo like we do- space is precious. Here I was using valuable real estate in the hall closet to store old shoes that I didn’t even want, while necessary clutter that should have been hidden away in the closet (like handbags, keys, wallets, sunglasses, mail to be sorted etc.) was forming untidy piles on our dining room table.

Yes I call those things necessary clutter. Because they are necessary items we use everyday- they just need a home out of eye’s sight as they tend to be loose-leaf and unsightly (especially when stored in the incorrect location).

After going through the closet I hung an over the door storage unit to house our miscellaneous items… Now I just need to have that talk with my husband about actually using it! I better go get the tea and cake.

The statue above is located in the breathtaking shallow pool at the Getty Villa in Malibu. I imagine I would lounge like that knowing I lived in a clutter-free home...

Look for a special Thursday post this week with exciting announcements...

The Daily Connoisseur is now available on Amazon Kindle

My husband and I were recently looking for an investment property and toured various open houses in the Santa Monica and Los Angeles area. I enjoy attending open houses because I love to look inside people's homes and to see how they live. Generally, when people put their home on the market they make an effort to clean it up and get rid of the clutter. There were two homes we toured, however, that... (how shall I say this delicately?) did not! The display of clutter was so shocking in these homes I left bewildered and turned to Mr. Connoisseur saying, “I just don’t know how people can live like that!”

These two homes stand out in my mind like something out of a horror film (or at least out of that reality television show entitled 'Hoarders'). They each were so massively cluttered with stuff- everything you can imagine from books, to paperwork to Christmas decorations to clothes to miscellaneous junk. Every counter top- every space was filled with something. The effect made my skin crawl.

You would think seeing these overly cluttered homes would make me feel better about my own clutter situation- which quite honestly pales in comparison- but not so. I started to think, what if these homes started off like mine, with only little pockets of clutter? An unorganized junk drawer here- an overstuffed coat closet there...

For the first home we toured, the actual owner and not the real estate broker, gave us a tour (I’m still not sure why this happened- but it did). The woman was probably in her mid-sixties and warned us about the clutter before we entered the home. She said, “You will see there is a bit of clutter- it’s just the state of my mind right now”. I remember thinking, how true that statement was.

Clutter is a definite reflection of our state of mind. This woman’s house was overcome with clutter- she must have been going through a hard time.

It got me thinking. In my house I have small pockets of clutter- but clutter, nonetheless. I try to keep the main rooms and surfaces clear, but there are corners or piles where clutter just naturally forms. So what does this say about my state of mind?

As I have mentioned before, Famille Chic not only didn’t have pockets of clutter- they didn’t even have an ounce of clutter. Madame Chic's clutter-free home continues to act as a model and motivator for me- I know it can be done!

As a side note, last year I befriended a French couple that lives in California. They graciously had me as a guest in their home and gave me a tour of their beautiful and modern living space. I remarked with amazement that I didn't see any clutter in their home. They laughed knowingly and shrugged their shoulders. I think they might have heard that before from previous American guests. Which makes me wonder- do they teach a mandatory course on clutter management in the French school system? Or is maintaining a clutter-free home merely in their blood?

The de-cluttering process I’m going through in my own home is rather thorough. My plan is to eradicate clutter for good and I am happy to report that I am making breakthroughs. I have surmised that the pockets of visible clutter exist because our hidden storage spaces (any closets, drawers, etc.) are also cluttered, thereby not providing the proper space for our things. Our clutter pockets are symptoms of a greater problem- the general lack of organized systems in our home.

Next week, in part 2, I will explore the de-cluttering process further, including my personal experience with banning clutter for good and musings on the necessary mindset behind having a clutter-free home.

I would like to know... do you have issues with clutter?


The bust of the young woman above is in marble and dates back to A.D. 120 - 130. She is thought to be from Cyme which is now present-day Turkey. Her braided hairstyle was popular during the reign of the Emperor Hadrian, who ruled between A.D. 117 - 138. She can be found in the Getty Villa, Malibu.


The Daily Connoisseur is now available on Amazon Kindle

I must share this with you. As you know we subscribe to the Financial Times out of London. It’s really an excellent newspaper and their weekend edition is superb- particularly their Life & Style section, the House & Home section and their magazine How to Spend It. There are always thought provoking articles on art, food, fashion and a rather interesting column called Lunch with FT where they interview some person of note over lunch and also provide what was ordered. (I love knowing what people have for lunch and things like that. In fact, one of my favorite pastimes when standing in line at the grocery store is to observe what other people buy- it is very telling!). But I digress.

The first place I go to each weekend is David Tang’s column in House & Home. Sir David Tang is a business man (behind the famed Shanghai Tang stores, among other endeavors) that divides his time between Hong Kong, London and China. He runs an advice column on the subjects of “property, interiors, etiquette, home, parties and anything else that might be bothering you”. Not only does Mr. Tang possess a rapier wit, but his first class opinions on the above subjects are refreshing and unparalleled. I ran across the below question one week and found his answer to encapsulate everything I’ve ever expressed regarding only using the best things you have. Regard:

A reader writes:

In our household, Saturday breakfast is the sacred meal of the week, enjoyed at home around the kitchen table. My girlfriend makes an effort arranging the glassware in a certain order. I then have to rearrange the order of the glasses. This upsets my girlfriend, as she argues that caring about such trivial things at our own breakfast table, with no other company present, is petit bourgeois. Please advise.

Mr. Tang’s response:

One definition of a gentleman is that he uses his butter knife when dining alone. I tend to agree. I always succumb to my pair of ivory chopsticks and my best crockery and cutlery and linen whenever eating alone. Caring about how things look only when there is an audience is precisely to be petit bourgeois. I am very much from middle-class stock but I hate most of its ingredients. So you should insist on getting your breakfast table right, and observe to your girlfriend that by practicing the best, you won’t become phoney when you are joined by the Joneses and the Smiths.

I really couldn’t have said it better myself! When you use the best things you have and 'practice your best' on a regular basis, you slowly train your habits and your palate to appreciate quality. Those that save their best things for company are missing out on living a quality life and are, it has to be said, petit bourgeois.

I would love to know... are you using the best you have on a daily basis? Or are you saving your best for later?


I recently visited the Getty villa in Malibu and took some photos of Greek and Roman antiquities. The Greek wine vessels and implements pictured above are in silver and date back to 350- 300 B.C. It looks like the ancient Greeks appreciated fine tableware as well...


The Daily Connoisseur is now available on Amazon Kindle

Living with Famille Chic completely changed my mindset of living and leading a quality life. Quality with regards to tangible things like clothing, furniture and food, as well as quality of the intangible- quality of thoughts, of feelings, of intellect. So many things about the French lifestyle promotes quality.

Madame Chic and her family were great role models for this. Their clothes were quality, their appearances were quality, their home was quality, their food was quality, their discussions were quality, the time they spent together was quality time… they really lived fully realized lives.

It could have been their aristocratic state of mind but they believed they deserved to live well and they did indeed do just that. They were so comfortable in their skin- so genuinely content with their lives. Their living well had nothing to do with money and everything to do with attitude and discernment.

It was in Paris, really, where I became a daily connoisseur. If a connoisseur by definition is an expert able to appreciate a field (such as fine art, for example) then a daily connoisseur is someone who appreciates every aspect of daily life. Someone who seeks out the highest quality in whatever tickles their fancy.

Seeking out nothing but quality in your life is not about being snobby or pretentious- it’s about being selective and discerning, realizing that life is short and why not fill it with the best things and experiences you can manage.

Once you commit to living a life of quality, your discernment will infuse into every aspect of your life. You will be more selective of the foods you choose to eat, the fabrics of the clothes that you wear, the way you choose to spend your time…

You are less likely to binge on fast food or snacks- to hastily purchase an inferior article of clothing just because it was on sale- or sit for hours in front of the TV while your life slips away…

Also…

You will start to cherish the space around you and are less likely to litter it with clutter.

You begin to reevaluate your relationships and only give your time and energy to the people most important to you.

You begin to respect yourself and trust your instincts by not overextending yourself- (You will become comfortable with saying no. Saying no is perfectly OK!)

You will speak with purpose and allow the words that come out of your mouth to be quality words. Your thoughts, quality thoughts and actions, quality actions.

And in turn, become the daily connoisseur of your own life…

I’m not sure whether Famille Chic was aware of their commitment to a life of quality- as far as they were concerned that was just their life and they knew no different. But I am very grateful for my observations on the subject and I’ve committed myself (and it is an ongoing process) to cherish quality above all...

I would love to know… what does a life of quality mean to you?


Won’t you stay tuned for #1?



A typical Parisian farmer’s market is pictured above where quality items abound…

My book, Lessons from Madame Chic: The Top 20 Things I Learned While Living in Paris will be published by Simon & Schuster and re-released in the fall of 2012.


The Daily Connoisseur is now available on Amazon Kindle

Last year I did a post on guest bedrooms that outlined everything needed for a perfect spare room. This one is dedicated to your own bedroom- which should have more character, personality and luxury than the guest bedroom.

In fact, the master bedroom could be the most important room in your house. It is the room you spend the most time in (even though most of that time you are sleeping…)

For living well in the master bedroom here is my essential list:

A large, comfy bed. This is pretty self explanatory. My husband is quite tall, I like to stretch out in my sleep and Gatsby is (unfortunately) always at the foot of the bed so nothing short of a California King will do for us ☺

A fluffy duvet and very good pillows. By ‘good’ I mean the most comfortable for you. We have lots of fluffy pillows to prop us up when we read but my favorite one to sleep with is the Tempurpedic with neck support. For the duvet, the lighter and fluffier the better… a good one makes you feel like you are sleeping in a cloud…

White linens. I’m sure not everyone is with me on this, but I just prefer all of my linens to be white. For me, clean, crisp, white linens are the only sort I like to sleep in.

Overhead lighting on a dimmer switch. Dimmed lights in the bedroom are so important. They can add so much atmosphere and really help prepare you for sleep. A good bedside lamp for reading is also essential…

Music. Whether it be through your iPod or an old fashioned cd player (which is what we have). I love to play classical music or opera when I am getting ready for bed. It just makes rubbing in those night creams and changing into your nightgown that much more decadent.

No television… talk about a passion killer.

Miscellaneous items that make you happy. For me that is my perfume tray, jewelry box, candles and orchids…

Curtains. (I prefer curtains to blinds) Ours are cream colored linen- they filter just the right amount of light in and add a softness to the room.

A system for putting your clothes away (either out of the room in a dirty clothes hamper or hung back up in your closet). I try to only keep my dressing gown on the bench at the foot of our bed.


C’est tout! We are currently looking for a beautiful bed frame/ headboard and in the meantime are sleeping with our mattresses on the floor (I feel like I am in college again!) but I am still comfortable and am getting plenty of luxurious nights of sleep- which I plan to enjoy to the fullest before the baby arrives…

I would love to know… how do you live well in the master bedroom?

Gatsby is pictured above in our master bedroom…

While one’s wardrobe is not technically a room (unless you have a large walk in closet- and if you do- lucky you!) it deserves its own post because too many of us neglect this oh so important counterpart to our lives. Here are my tips for how to live well with your wardrobe:

All wardrobes need constant editing- at the very least twice a year when the major seasons change (Spring and Fall). Assess every article of clothing in your wardrobe. Do you love it? When was the last time you wore it? Does it still fit you? Does it need mending? Be ruthless. If you have an aversion to getting rid of things, put everything that is questionable into a space bag and hide it away for six months. If you haven’t thought twice about it during that time, you probably will never wear it.

Hang your clothes in an organized system that makes sense to you. For some people that is hanging all dresses together, silk blouses together, etc.; for some people that would be hanging your garments by color. I go slightly between the two. I hang my clothes by category (sleeveless shirts, short sleeve blouses, long sleeve, blazers- you get the idea) and I hang the clothes in gradients of color in each separate category (lighter colors to darker colors).

No wire hangers s’il vous plait. (A good way to recycle wire hangers is by giving them back to the dry cleaners). Use only high quality hangers in either wood, felt or cloth- your clothes will thank you. I purchased all black felt hangers from Bed Bath and Beyond for a great price- I love how they make my closet look like a high end boutique.

Take care of your shoes. I store most of my shoes in cloth shoe bags. Some people keep them in clear boxes or boxes with a Polaroid of the shoe on the front. Know when your shoes have ‘expired’. Are the soles really worn? Are they starting to look shabby? What about the interior of the shoe? Is it in good condition? I had to retire my very favorite pair of grey patent leather quilted ballet flats by London Sole recently and it was painful- but I had just worn them to death. It was the fashionable thing to do. And now I get to shop for a new pair!

Also, be ruthless with regards to your drawers. Undergarments, lingerie, loungewear, sleepwear and workout clothes should also be assessed at least twice a year. Get rid of anything that looks tired and ‘worn’. I like to ask myself ‘ if someone else were rifling through my drawers would I be embarrassed by what they find?’

And finally, just remember the French philosophy when it comes to the wardrobe. A chic French woman would rather have 10 high quality garments than a wardrobe stuffed with ‘options’.

My closet is pictured above. In this particular section I keep dresses, blazers and coats...

One great perk I’ve noticed about being pregnant is that everyone is nice to you. I mean everyone. Friends, family, strangers. Walking down the street I have gotten more smiles and pleasant glances than I have in my entire lifetime. More offers of assistance, more polite conversations… and, I must say, it is very pleasant to be on the receiving end of all of this.

So I decided to conduct an experiment. For one whole week I was going to be really nice to everyone I encountered. I’m generally nice anyway but I mean really nice- you know smiling at strangers (provided I’m on the right side of town), giving out compliments (heartfelt ones only, of course), and just generally emitting happiness.

I decided to start small with smiling at the people I pass by on the street. I walk a lot in Santa Monica. I walk Gatsby in my neighborhood, to the beach and amongst the shops on Montana Avenue. I decided to give everyone I passed on these walks a very bright smile and possibly even the occasional “hello” or “good morning”.

At first I was shy with it. People are generally reserved in Santa Monica. The majority of people keep to themselves and the most you’ll get is a tight lipped smile and a furtive once-over behind large designer sunglasses. So my smiles and ‘good mornings’ were tentative at first. But I started to see that even these feeble attempts at niceness really affected the other party. At first the strangers looked at me in a slightly suspicious manner. Some people even looked behind them to make sure I wasn’t smiling at some one else. But as my greetings became more confident, smiles were returned and for one unguarded moment, I began to share the refreshing feeling of goodwill amongst strangers.

Now I am a pro at smiling. I even smiled at Meg Ryan when I spotted her lunching at R+D Kitchen on Montana Avenue (she probably thought I was just a crazy fan, but that is beside the point). And I must say, it feels good. We are so used to rushing about our day, stuck in our heads, thinking about the future, that we forget the beauty of the present moment. And something as small as sharing a smile with a passerby can correct all of that, jolt you back into the moment and really feel quite exhilarating…

When was the last time you smiled at a stranger?


Pictured above are a casual bouquet of tulips on my dining room table... enough to make any tulip lover smile.

Some time ago I watched a documentary on Princess Diana where they showed her living quarters at Kensington Palace. Of course she lived in beautifully appointed rooms, but I will never forget the sight of her desk- which was kept (and still is, I believe) in the same condition- the majority of its contents untouched- after her untimely death.

The primary thing I observed about her desk was that it was completely in order. It was tidy and organized displaying only a few nice writing pens, a pad of paper, a picture of her boys and a various writing boxes.

Now if I were ever to leave the world in an untimely manner I would shudder to think what people would think of my desk. Yes, my desk (and entire home office for that matter) is my Achilles heel. While the rest of my home is relatively in order, my home office is a nightmare. So I am not really one to give advice on this subject. I can, however, tell you what I’d like to see happen:

An easy, fail proof system, whereby mail and bills are sorted, paid and filed in a timely matter (this has more to do with me and less to do with my office).

A display of only the books that interest me in that moment- books I’m currently reading or referencing (I have a tremendous amount of book clutter- so much so I’m thinking of getting a kindle).

All electronic clutter banished! I detest electronic clutter. My husband says, “Where do you want it to go? This is the office- this is where it belongs!” I don’t really have a response to that.

An inbox on my desk with only active, relevant paperwork.

A filing system (which I have) that gets used on a weekly basis to file away all stray and important papers (which is where I go astray… it’s more on a monthly basis for me… this is one of the Sisyphean tasks I abhor).

A rule that says the home office cannot be a dumping ground for ‘stuff’. Everyone has one room in their home where they sneak miscellaneous things in. You know- bags of clothes to be donated, boxes of books to be stored, old TVs etc… trouble is I never get around to taking care of these things. These things should be placed by the front door and dealt with ASAP.

There you go. Even though my desk is actually a folding table from Costco (we have yet to properly furnish our home office) there is no excuse why it can’t look as beautiful and efficient as Princess Diana’s…

Please tell me I am not the only one who struggles with this…

One of the great merits of my home office is that it has this magnificent window (pictured above).

The living room should be a place of vibrancy- where activities such as, playing games, reading a book, eating chocolates, sleeping by the fire and watching a movie can all be accomplished in relative comfort and luxury.

Ideal living rooms will have lots of light and comfortable seating- enough for the family and a few guests. There will probably be a television, a fireplace, hopefully a place for books (if there is no library) and art.

Our living room is a wonderful space... and while the furniture is not exactly what I would choose as my first choice (seating is limited chez nous)- I’m grateful to at least have something to sit on! I like to focus on the positives, which in our house includes high ceilings, tall, European-style windows and a functioning fireplace.

These are the extras that make the space that much more special:

Recessed lighting on a dimmer switch. I love being able to dim the lights. We have a dimmer in every single room in the house, it adds instant atmosphere come twilight.

Pretty curtains to dress the windows. We chose a neutral taupe color that I knew I wouldn’t tire of... maybe in our next house I’ll go for something a little bolder.

A neutral, warm color on the walls. In our case- it’s cottage white. Again, I will never tire of this and I can add color via accessories- which brings me to my next point...

Lots of sumptuous throw pillows and blankets. I found some great faux fur throw pillows in chocolate that are so comfortable on our tiny sofa- they were from Bed Bath and Beyond... very affordable.

A place for pets. Gatsby loves to sit on his red, fluffy dog bed right in front of the fire on cold winter nights.

A warm rug beneath your feet- the best you can afford. Right now ours is from Ikea, but I dream of a gorgeous Persian-style rug one day...

A coffee table with a few interesting books on it and a place to keep all of those remote controls. Controlling the electronic clutter and coffee table clutter is essential here. I know the TV is there but I don’t want to be drawn to it.

A means of playing music. I love listening to music throughout the day. We have installed surround sound speakers so the sound fills the room!

Art that makes you happy. Or at the very least inspires fond memories. I have a framed Art Deco poster from Roger La Grenouille in Paris that brings to mind magical memories every time I look at it...

Voilà- my bare essential list for living well in the living room!

I would love to know… what is your living room like?


Gatsby is pictured above on the tiny, white sofa in our living room.