# Marriage # pregnancy

Chat with Jennifer: More Wallpaper, Ten-Year Anniversary & More

Chat with me in today's video where I share a sneak peak into my daughters' bedroom wallpaper renovation. Thank you for your kind compliments about the paper we chose for our own master bedroom. I love it more and more each day. It's such a great feeling when your interior design efforts are successful (as I've had my fair share of failures in the past!).

For our daughter's bedroom, I wanted something sweet and floral (because they both love flowers so much). We chose from Norwall's Pretty Prints 4 book. Their bedroom is not complete as I am still waiting on the curtains and beds to go in, so I am not ready to share pictures yet (although you will see some in today's video). I'll be sure to share an update with you once their room is complete.

I also discuss our recent ten-year anniversary celebration and give my best marriage advice. There is also a pregnancy update. I do hope you'll check out my video this week. If you are unable to see the video above, click here, look in the sidebar of this blog, or visit my YouTube channel (don't forget to subscribe) at www.youtube.com/TheDailyConnoisseur

Pre-order the Madame Chic Collection boxed set from Amazon or Barnes & Noble. The set comes out November 1, 2016 and will make a wonderful present for the holidays.

Her Luxurious Africa reviews Lessons from Madame Chic and shares her top 5 lessons from the book.

Life With Dee reviews Lessons from Madame Chic, and shares her favorite takeaways from each chapter.

Modern Mrs. Darcy tries out the ten-item wardrobe. This is an older post, but one worth checking out.

Comment of the Week
Valerie writes:
Hello Jennifer,
Thank you for all of your wonderful books. I just wanted to tell you how much At Home With Madam Chic has helped me improve my days. The breakdown of Morning, Afternoon, and Evening has encouraged me to look at my day as different occasions to enjoy simple pleasures that enhance and add to the day. I usually have the highest stress midday and used to dread the afternoon but now I look forward to a cup of tea and some sort of de-stressing activities. You are such an inspiration, I can't tell you how glad I am to have read your books they are changing my life. I love the wallpaper, your room reminds me of the Granthams' room in Downton Abbey. Thank you again!

Dear Valerie, Thank you for your testimonial. One of my favorite concepts from At Home with Madame Chic is the breakdown of the morning, afternoon and evening, and how it is wonderful to transition into the different parts of the day with renewed hope. Thank you for sharing your story!

This week I would love to know... How did you decorate your child's room? What is your child's style? What is your best marriage advice? How do you celebrate your anniversaries? Let me know in the comment section and your comment could be chosen as comment of the week!

Don't miss next week's etiquette chat where I share my etiquette horror story with you from Geoffrey's. See you then!

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Luciana Erregue said...

Hi everyone!

Thanks for the inspiring 10th year anniversary video; I can certainly relate to all of the points you raised in regards to marital advice. In our case, we have been married for 25 years, and have now two grown children, both in university.
It is interesting to suddenly discover as partial empty nesters, that we have more time to ourselves both individually and as a couple. And I stress the importance of maintaining one's individuality if at all possible, so that we can "recharge" batteries and appreciate our family and husbands even more. By maintaining our individuality I do not just superficially refer to the typical "girl's night out" but to true autonomy for both members of the marriage. I refer to cultivating our individual hobbies or passions, and happily discovering our loved one hidden talents. The key, however, is balance. In our case, what really kept us close was late night talks, once the children had gone to bed.
On those nights we would discuss the day, and our children, making it possible to "fine tune" our family's path. The hardest parts so far have been trying to keep calm in front of family's health or financial crises, and I confess that my husband has been the rock and anchor I needed at the time. Congratulations to you and your husband, and for many more happy years together!.

Jessica Schneidereit said...

We will celebrate 25 years of marriage this summer!
My advice is travel travel travel.
Don't accumulate things, accumulate experiences.
Stay healthy. I could have lost my wonderful guy twice because of our eating choices.
Laugh over your differences, it's easier than crying over them.
KonMari your Kr@p as a present to your marriage, you won't regret it!


Jeneric Generation said...

Congratulations on ten years together, Jennifer! My husband and I will be married five years in October. Time does fly!! As corny (or obvious) as it sounds, I love the reminder that we are on the same team. When I can feel an argument starting, reminding myself that it isn't "me against him" helps me switch my perspective and remember that we are each other's safe spot. We're rooting for each other!

Stefani Cartwright said...

Hi Jennifer. Congratulations on your wedding anniversary. I too celebrated my 10th wedding anniversary (14th May) and have 2 young children. My best marriage advise is that you should not try to change your spouse. The only person you can really change is yourself. I have found that by striving to be my best self (and your book and videos help immensely!) It then also inspires and influences your spouse and family to be their best selves. For example I have been ckearing clutter in my wardrobe the last few months but did not force my husband to do so. However last weekend of his own accord he decluttered his entire wadrobe and drawers! Thank you for your wonderful books! Stefani

Anonymous said...

Hi! Our 10th anniversary was a bit similar to yours, although not geographically so. We re-lived our first date, at the place of were it took place :) We've been married for 12 years now.

I can really recommend that sort of celebration, because like the marital advice you gave Jennifer it reminds you of those first rosy days & all the reasons you fell for your spouse.

Congratulations again, hope you get to celebrate many more dacades in happiness together!

Michelle said...

Congratulations, Jennifer on 10 years. I've been married 16 years, and my best marriage advice is to spend time together. I know of someone many people that really don't spend time with their spoise doing things other than house projects or with the kids. They are always the ones that seem to grow apart too. I always say that you can't grow apart if you are growing together.

Michelle said...

Congratulations, Jennifer on 10 years. I've been married 16 years, and my best marriage advice is to spend time together. I know of someone many people that really don't spend time with their spoise doing things other than house projects or with the kids. They are always the ones that seem to grow apart too. I always say that you can't grow apart if you are growing together.

Carolyn Maves said...

Last week when I volunteered in my grandson's first grade classroom, I noticed that most of the little girls were wearing dresses and sandals. We have had a cool spring here in northern Wisconsin, which makes it hard to wear dresses. But now the weather has changed. I will admit to being surprised to see all the dresses, as I feel that people are dressing 'down' nowadays. I work one on one with the students and I made a point to speak affirmingly to the girls in their dresses. It was so fun to see the bright colors and pretty sandals.

OneEnglishLady said...

Phil and I have been married for 42 years on June 15th, we are 'empty nesters' having raised 2 boys. Since my husband is a Physicist we have lived and worked in Oxford (UK), New Zealand, Canberra (Australia) and now Brisbane where we are settled. My advice is to talk, talk, talk about everything and anything and show interest in your husbands work life and creative pursuits/hobbies even when you don't feel like it!!Phil is a Bonsai enthusiast and he would never know that it doesn't turn me on in the slightest! Each stage brings different challenges and I have found that trying to be adaptable is the best approach. The flush of first love becomes after 42 years moulded and comfortable, it is respect and a sense of comfort rather than love in its pure form. I will never forget my Mum (married 60 plus years)adapting when my Dad retired. He decided that he enjoyed cooking and ended up taking over the main cooking role (which at 96 he still enjoys doing - sadly now just for himself). My Mum feeling a little sidelined decided that she would focus on deserts and used to whip up fantastic pavlovas for family dinners and other lovely treats. An example I think of the give and take of marriage. Best wishes to you and your husband for many more happy years of marriage. Lindsey Back

Kari said...

Congrats Jennifer on your anniversary. I have been wedded to my best friend for 18 years and the secret for us appears to be a secret to many! No. Children. We never regretted that decision one second. We have had the most amazing life together and continue to do so every day. I know most people will say they can't imagine life without kids. Well I can't imagine it any other way. We have our own lives and we have our together life. And we are both happy and content. The only other advice I would have to give anyone about to get married is please please spend some time planning the marriage and not just planning the wedding. It's a fleeting moment that means little years in the future. But your plan for your marriage will mean a lot forever.

Rose said...

We had our -- gulp! -- 40th wedding anniversary on May 15th. My best marriage advice is to remember that the person you're married to is going to change a lot and so are you, to use your brains, your sense of humour and your best manners with each other every day.

Hannah said...

Congratulations Jennifer on your anniversary. My husband and I will have been married for 20 years in December. My mother always told my siblings and I that it was far more important to show good manners to the people you live with and love than total strangers. I think this is very good advice for a happy marriage. Some years ago I read about the four behaviours to watch out for in a marriage that Dr John Gottman describes as the "Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse" - criticism, defensiveness, stonewalling and contempt. It is so easy to slip into bad patterns of interaction, good manners are key!

NickandEmily Stewart said...

I have been married for 9 years and my best piece of advice is to encourage your husband always...behind his back and to his face!

Anne Gables said...

We have been married for 48 years and we learned early on to 'discuss' rather than 'fight.' Furthermore, those discussions were best held in a restaurant where we could not yell or walk out on the other person; rather, we had to remain civil. We are both retired and empty nesters, yet we still have 'discussions' (although those troublesome moments do not arise often). Our two children tease us about being hopeless romantics. Marriage is about commitment -- "for better or worse." You are right: it's not easy and it takes staying the course. I love your posts and what you stand for!

Anonymous said...

Paul and I have been together for 30 years: 15 living together, and 15 married. Like Kari, I think that a lot of our happiness comes from not having had kids. Not everyone is cut out to be a parent, and I'm glad that I realized that very early on, and finally found someone who also had no desire to procreate.

I think that one of the most important pieces of advice I could give is to choose your battles. I have witnessed friends go through tumultuous marriages and break up with friends simply because they did not know when to keep their mouths shut. So many arguments seem to be about inconsequential things: the toilet seat left up, towels on the floor, or who's right and who's wrong on any number of issues. This is all unimportant. If you are going to argue, argue about something that means something to you. Toilet seats??? Really????

Rachelle said...

I really enjoy your books & blog Jennifer! I have been married 8 years & have 2 young boys. Your books have inspired me to take care of myself & be a gracious lady through the stresses of life. I cannot imagine my life without children. I would be so selfish. I believe they make me a better person. Having children can change your marriage, but also draw you closer as a couple as you share the joys of taking care of them, playing with them & training them. Best wishes on your 3rd precious baby..

Deanna said...

Congratulations on 10 years! Our 35th is coming up next month and we will be spending several days in California to celebrate. My best advice is to find something you enjoy doing together and laugh a lot.

I love the wallpaper! Our current house had wallpaper in several places. Horrible, horrible, ugly stuff from the 70s. I ripped it all off immediately and then chose new wallpaper to replace it. One wall of our entry and one wall in the adjoining library are papered in a very subtle pattern in the same color as the other walls. One wall of our bedroom and part of the master bathroom are papered in a very light, subtle pink stripe and the walls are painted pale pink. We papered the bottom part of our daughter's bedroom (now guest room) in a lavender and white stripe, the walls above are a pale green and the wallpaper border between is a floral with those colors. It matches the comforter on the bed. Our 50s-style kitchen has wallpaper on the upper part of one wall with white beadboard below. I know a lot of people don't like wallpaper these days but when done well, I still like it. Fortunately all the paper we chose 18 years ago was subtle enough that it doesn't look dated.

Finally, thank you SO much for linking to my book review blog post. I should have part 2 posted this Friday. I'm really excited about the boxed set coming out in November. I doubt I can wait that long to read the other two books so I will most likely buy them individually and then give them away on my blog after I buy myself the boxed set.

Best of luck with your upcoming delivery. You look great!

Amanda Swilley said...

Congratulations on your 10th wedding anniversary! I loved your chat about how your marriage has become stronger since having children.

I have been married a mere five and a half years, but what I've noticed in my marriage that really helps is that we always thank each other. It's not just thanking one another for the big things (thanks for taking my car in for service for me!) but all the little things day to day. My husband always makes sure to make sure I know how much he appreciates that I do little things like washing the dishes, or doing the laundry and folding his clothes, and I return the favor by thanking him for the things he does. It keeps us from feeling unappreciated and growing resentful in our relationship. He tells me thank you, and I know that whatever boring task I'm taking care of is being noticed and is contributing to the household.

Debs said...

Happy 10th Anniversary:)

Evaline said...

Another enjoyable video. I would say that my husband taught me how to love...he has an open heart and is very affectionate and forgiving. He makes me feel appreciated. And he makes me laugh a lot...every day, about the silly things in life. I am more serious and support him too in many ways that he appreciates. Plus we share the same values and have many varied interests including the arts and nature ...we like the same food, colours, books, music, movies and people, and always have interesting conversations, so we count ourselves very fortunate.

Betsy Maddox said...

Happy 10th Anniversary!

We will be married 31 years this August. We were high school sweethearts & got married right after college. We have four grown children now and a very busy, full life. Even after 30+ years, though, we are still very in love. We have a lot of fun together and we not only love each other, we LIKE each other. I think that is really important. Despite our busy schedules and all the responsibilities we have at work and church and with our family, we always make time to spend together....whether it's going out to dinner somewhere, traveling, or just grabbing ice cream on a Saturday afternoon, we make sure we don't let too much time go by without spending time with just the two of us. I remember when my kids were little, someone told me that before I knew it, the kids would be grown and gone and then it would be back to just the two of us. When it gets to that point, you don't want to look at that person you married and think, "I don't really even know you anymore!" Make each other a priority (even over your children) because one of the best things you can do for you kids is have a happy marriage and model what true love looks like. It spills over into everything else that goes on in your family and your kids will thrive because of it. Also, put God first. It's easy to break a promise you make to another person, but when you promise God you will love someone until you die, that is something I take really seriously. And finally, be forgiving and focus on the good things. No one is perfect. Just enjoy the good things about your spouse and focus on all the things you love about them. Keep a positive mindset and forgive a lot! Those are the things that have helped make our marriage a happy one all these years. :)

Ashu Nair said...

Hi Jennifer,

I live in India and here there is a concept of "Arrange marriage" wherein the parent's find a groom for you and if you like him you go ahead and marry else they would find another match and so on. It is believed that you fall in love after your wedding.This is the traditional way of getting married here,although it seems to work for most of them it feels very scary to me. Now they have started "finding" someone for me and I don't know how to judge a person I want to spend my life with.
Please advice.

Ashu Nair said...

Hi Jennifer,

I live in India and here there is a concept of "Arrange marriage" wherein the parent's find a groom for you and if you like him you go ahead and marry else they would find another match and so on. It is believed that you fall in love after your wedding.This is the traditional way of getting married here,although it seems to work for most of them it feels very scary to me. Now they have started "finding" someone for me and I don't know how to judge a person I want to spend my life with.
Please advice.

Alicja said...

Hi Jennifer.
Congratulations on your 10th wedding anniversary!
I read/watch your blog for about 6 months and I really like it. You are so right!
Thank you for all your books. I can't wait your third book - polish edition (although I read it in english :-)
This year my husband and I will be celebrating 13 anniversary of marriage. My marriage advise is to go with your husband to a date once a week. I know it may seem almost impossible when you have young children, but it is worth trying. The date can take place at home - a dinner or movie. It should be time only for you and husband. And from my experience when we cultivate our dates our marriage is improving.

AquinoFamily99 said...

Thank you for this post!
We have been married for 16 years and our oldest child is 14. I agree with all of your wise and beautiful words on marriage and the blessing of children.
I also appreciate all of the wonderful comments left here. What a great community! A young person could find so much to help them think about marriage just watching and reading through.

My tip for bad habits: my sweet husband takes care of all of his dirty laundry right away - except for his socks, because he removes them along with his work boots as soon as he enters and sits. So right from the beginning of our marriage, I found myself collecting his socks from the floor by the sofa every day. I thought it should be simple for him to pick them up but I told myself - choose the positive. I changed my thought to, "I'm grateful I get to be the one to pick up
after him and not some other girl. He chose me and I'm so blessed!"
After a few years he started taking care of his own socks before bed. I'm so glad I never made an issue of it.
I try to think this way any time a bad habit of his gets in my way. I'm still blessed to be his girl, and I want to give him every reason to feel the same toward me!

Beautiful wallpaper! And congratulations on your anniversary and your new little boy!

God bless your sweet family!

Summer Smith said...

Thank you for the reminder of marriage. I appreciate it, it couldn't have come at a better time for me. I find myself very often becoming nit-picky! ;) The best advice I've received prior to getting married was from a friend of mine that has 4 kids and it was in the heat of the moment of being frustrated at her own husband, but she said, when you get your home, spend money on a great picture of you and your husband and put it in your bedroom and when you get really irritated, look at that and you'll remember why you married him. I loved that. Also, my mom has said to me, and I need to relearn this every day, but, she said she heard somewhere "Every day remember to leave several things unsaid." Which just helped me because there are things you COULD say, but should you really and will it help your relationship with your husband. I love your wallpaper. However, I would LOVE to know where you got your blue and water toile-ish curtains from!?!? :)