Showing posts with label lessons in elegance. Show all posts
Showing posts with label lessons in elegance. Show all posts

5.05.2022

5 Ways to Take the High Road and Remain UNBOTHERED

6:11 AM 1 Comments

 



In this modern media age, we have been exposed to all sorts of bad behavior: public altercations, online tantrums, Facebook fights, and in-person confrontations (just to name a few). It is a fact that we will at some point be triggered by someone in our life. How do we come out of this situation as better people? How can we grow from this? How can we take the high road and not stoop to their level? This is what classy and elegant people do. I hope you enjoy today's video.
To do so we must remain calm, classy, elegant, nonplussed

Calm- not showing or feeling nervousness, anger, or other strong emotions. Classy- stylish and sophisticated. Elegant- pleasingly graceful and stylish in appearance or manner. Nonplussed- unperturbed
Here are 5 ways to take the high road and remain unbothered.
1. Be too big to care. Be magnanimous. Magnanimous means to be "generous or forgiving, especially toward a rival or less powerful person". This is the essence of taking the high road. If you are dealing with someone who is using dirty tricks to try to upset you, you are dealing with a less powerful person because their consciousness is limited. Their maturity is lacking. Simply understand this and be magnanimous toward them.
2. Use this affirmation: None of these things move me. – Acts 20:24 I use this affirmation frequently throughout my day when things aren’t going how I want them to go. None of these things move me. I’ve even shared this with a good friend and she has found it very useful too. When you find yourself wrapped up in a situation that is producing anger for you, your vision is clouded and you feel like this experience is all there is. Get used to immediately saying “None of these things move me”. It’s the ultimate statement to remain UNBOTHERED.
3. Don’t magnify the problem with your attention. “My experience is what I agree to attend to.” – William James What do you want to attend to? Is someone trying to drag you down to their level? Are you going to give that attention? Or are you going to take the high road and remain up high, no matter what they do? You are in control of the experience you have.
4. Remember that when you retaliate in anger, you only hurt yourself. “Heat not a furnace for your foe so hot that it do singe yourself”. Henry Vlll Shakespeare Remain nonplussed. When you act out in anger, you come off as the bad one. It doesn’t look good. They never see your side. You are the one who looks unhinged. You “singe yourself” as Shakespeare said.
5. Your ships come in over a calm sea. -Florence Scoval Shinn Remember: when you remain calm, you come out on top. Things start working in your favor. If you are dealing with someone who has a history of trying to push your buttons and get under your skin, they will eventually become bored with you and move on to someone else. “Your ships” represent what you want. I’m guessing what you want is peace. Your peace will come in over a calm sea. Think about it: if the sea is rough and turbulent in a storm, the ship cannot come into the harbor. Think of your reaction the same way. Whatever you want out of this situation will only come about once you are calm. It may take years… but come about it will.
🗝 Jennifer's Outfit Details
Miranda Frye crawler earring Jennifer10 for 10% off
Lilysilk black silk trousers Daily15 for 15% off
Jon Josef flats DAILYCON15 15% off


News

📍 Jennifer is a guest on Dr. Chloe Carmichael's podcast, The High Functioning Hotspot.

📍The hardcover copies of Lessons from Madame Chic are on their way! They should be in stock next month... Thank you for your patience.



📍 The Ten-Item Wardrobe eCourse is newly updated and back online with all new video, text, and new lessons. If you have previously purchased the ten-item wardrobe eCourse, you can access all of the new changes for free.

📍If you are looking for more content, consider becoming a member of The Daily Connoisseur through the Channel Memberships. In The Chic Society, I publish one vodcast every Friday and do one livestream or zoom call once a month. It only costs $1.99 a month. There are also upper tiers available for people who are interested in supporting the channel on a higher level and receiving monthly mentions in the videos. *NEW* We now have a penpal program too! 


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Polish Your Poise with Madame Chic on Instagram... 


Comment of the Week

Instant Local writes "A hundred years from now it will not matter what my bank account was, the sort of house I lived in nor the kind of car I drove...but the world may be different because I was important in the life of a child. " (F. E. Witcraft)

Thank you for sharing this beautiful quote. It is so true!


I hope you enjoyed today's video. I would love to hear about your strategy for taking the high road. Your comment could be chosen as comment of the week on the Daily Connoisseur.


Thank you to Skillshare for sponsoring today's video The first 1,000 people to use the link or my thedailyconnoisseur will get a 1 month free trial of Skillshare

NEW* Join The Chic Society on YouTube and become a member of The Daily Connoisseur.


Visit my newly designed Author Website

Shop my Amazon page for a comprehensive list of my favorite things and mentions on the blog.

Facebook facebook.com/JenniferLScottAuthor

Twitter @JL_Scott

Instagram @dailyconnoisseur

Take my affordable eCourses on the POISE *NEW course*, debt-free living, and efficiency at home


FTC: This post is sponsored by Skillshare. I use affiliate links, including Amazon affiliate links. Thank you for your support.  
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# Etiquette # lessons in elegance
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2.10.2022

5 Ways to Build Confidence | Lessons in Elegance

6:08 AM 3 Comments

 


Our Lessons in Elegance continue today as we discuss the best ways to build confidence. 



Welcome back to the Daily Connoisseur. Our lessons in elegance continue today as we uncover the secrets to building confidence. I am saving the best tip for last. It’s something you are not going to want to miss because, I promise you, this tip will change your life. Let's get into the 5 tips now...

Dress by Lilysilk Daily15 for 15% off 


🗝Film Yourself This may sound crazy. Especially if you have no aspirations to be an actress or a YouTube star, but you can learn a lot by filming yourself. You need to know what you look like and how you come across. You will notice how you sit, stand, speak, etc. I have learned so much about myself from doing this. Sit yourself in front of your phone camera and say something. Push past the inevitable embarrassment you will feel. You can delete the video after you study it. Tell yourself a story or read a poem or a passage from a book. Then rewatch it. You will see yourself as others see you. Don’t just do it once, but do it a few times. You will become more comfortable in front of the camera and work on your elocution and how you carry yourself naturally. 

Pajamas by MommeSilk  Daily15 for 15% off  Mighty Patch by Hero Cosmetics

🗝Polish your appearance When you look good, you feel good. Everyone knows that. I have a plethora of videos on how to look and dress elegantly. I even have a video with tips on how to look good from behind! I would say the biggest factor for confidence has got to be your skin. If you’ve ever had a big pimple or breakout anywhere on your face, you know the agony of talking to someone up close. In my personal experience, all I could think about was my acne. Those of you who have read Lessons from Madame Chic know the story about the pimple on my nose that caused extreme embarrassment… especially with my highly discerning art history professor. I can laugh about it now, but it wasn’t funny at the time! Having clear skin is a major component of everyday confidence. I suffered from acne like most teenagers too. I even struggled with it in my 20s and 30s. Thank you to Hero Cosmetics and their Mighty Patch (Allure's Best in Beauty acne spot treatment) for sponsoring this video code JENNIFER gives 15% off. 



🗝Brush up on your etiquette skills  Knowing what to do in all situations naturally gives you confidence. Brush up on your etiquette skills in all areas, from proper dining etiquette, to business etiquette, to greeting etiquette. Own an etiquette book like Polish Your Poise with Madame Chic or my friend Myka Meyer's etiquette books and brush up on your skills. When you know what fork to use, where to put your napkin and how to indicate how you are finished with your meal, you can free up your energy to enjoying yourself. Good manners exude confidence. They indicate that you were raised well and have a good education, whether that’s true or not. 

Blouse by Rungolee DailyC for free silk face mask Earrings by SKYE Jennifer20 for 20% off 

🗝Correct your posture Body language tells so much. That’s one of the reasons why you are going to film yourself. Look at your body language and how you carry yourself. If you are slumped over in your chair or hunching your shoulders out of anxiety, you are not acting confidently. Your body language should be elegant, at ease, and open. Make it a habit to check in regularly with your posture throughout the day. Awareness is the first step. 



 🗝Act as if it were impossible to fail I told you I saved the best tip for last and that’s true. This one tip will completely transform your life. I learned about it in a vintage book by Dorthea Brande called Wake Up and Live. The key takeaway from that book is this: ACT AS IF IT WERE IMPOSSIBLE TO FAIL. The author suggests that we set ourselves up for failure constantly. We leave room for it. We leave room for rejection or for people to choose someone else. I want you to pretend like you already know the end and the results are in your favor. Pretend you already got the job when you walk into the interview. Pretend that they did accept your offer, pretend that you already won the affection of the crowd. This is not to suggest you live in denial perpetually. But your assurance in each given situation can only aide you in building confidence. 

I hope you enjoy today's video. 



News


📍The hardcover version of Lessons from Madame Chic is back in stock. Hooray! :)
📍 The Ten-Item Wardrobe eCourse is newly updated and back online with all new video, text, and new lessons. If you have previously purchased the ten-item wardrobe eCourse, you can access all of the new changes for free.

📍If you are looking for more content, consider becoming a member of The Daily Connoisseur through the MEMBERSHIPS feature. In The Chic Society, I publish one vodcast every Friday and do one livestream or zoom call once a month. It only costs $1.99 a month. There are also upper tiers available for people who are interested in supporting the channel on a higher level and receiving monthly mentions in the videos. *NEW* We now have a penpal program too! 

📍Blogger has taken away the feature where you receive email notifications when I post. Because of this we are moving the blog to Wordpress in the new year. Please stay tuned. 

Instagram

The Madame Chic books on Instagram... 

Comment of the Week 
Kristin B. writes, "I'm all about a scheduled homemaking routine. After you posted a discussion on Little Women and the importance of the work not being shouldered by one family member, I was inspired to be more proactive about dividing the work in our home. I have seen a tremendous change in my work load! The meal planning is my next tackle. I love when you post these videos because it is so practical and yet it goes even deeper than the practicality - it helps us carve out a beautiful life!"

Hi Kristin, I'm so glad the Little Women video inspired you! Those tips inspired me too.

I hope you enjoyed today's video. I would love to know... how is your confidence doing? Where do you need to improve? Where does your confidence excel? Let us know and your comment could be chosen as comment of the week on the blog.


NEW* Join The Chic Society on YouTube and become a member of The Daily Connoisseur.


Visit my newly designed Author Website

Shop my Amazon page for a comprehensive list of my favorite things and mentions on the blog.

Facebook facebook.com/JenniferLScottAuthor

Twitter @JL_Scott

Instagram @dailyconnoisseur

Take my affordable eCourses on the POISE *NEW course*, debt-free living, and efficiency at home


FTC: This post is sponsored by Hero Cosmetics. I use affiliate links, including Amazon affiliate links. Thank you for your support.  
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# how to be confident # how to build confidence
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8.09.2021

8 Ways to Not Overreact and Remain Unbothered | Lessons in Elegance

6:21 AM 10 Comments

 




In my last video on being polished and elegant, many of you requested an in-depth discussion on how to not overreact. How do we remain unbothered and keep our cool when we are actually feeling very heated? Elegant people don't blow a gasket when they are angry. I'm sharing 8 ideas in today's video that will help you keep calm and remain classy... no matter what. 



 
 1. When you are angry and prone to overreacting… pause. Do nothing and see what happens. 

“Practice the pause. Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you're about to react harshly and you'll avoid doing and saying things you'll later regret.”― Lori Deschene 

 2. Analyze how you react to situations, because awareness is the first step: Novelist, Ellen Glasgow said, “What happens is not as important as how you react to what happens.” 

Become conscious about how you react to situations. Epictetus said, “It’s not what happens to you, but how you react to it that matters.” 

These quotes are powerful because we can’t control what happens to us. That is out of our control. What we can control is our reaction to these events. Notice patterns in your overreactions… is it with a specific person? Are you triggered by their mere presence? If so, notice that and be extra calm and vigilant around them. Know your triggers. 

3. Use their negativity as a motivator for you. Andy Warhol has been a major inspiration for me in this area. He dismissed his critics as not knowing what they were talking about and kept on making art. You do the same and allow other people's negativity to be a motivator for you. 

4. Never respond to someone when you are angry. I found some great Chinese proverbs on this one: Anger is always more harmful than the insult that caused it. (Chinese Proverb) Never answer a letter while you are angry. • In the midst of great joy, do not promise anyone anything. In the midst of great anger, do not answer anyone 's letter. • If you are patient in one moment of anger, you will escape a hundred days of sorrow. 

5. Gain control of your tongue. This requires self-discipline. Proverbs 21:23 KJV Whoso keepeth his mouth and his tongue keepeth his soul from troubles 

6. Don’t neglect yourself. If you are sleep-deprived, not taking care of yourself, not eating well… you can easily become a man or woman on the brink. You are going to be extra sensitive and touchy. Take time every day to care for yourself. Afternoon tea, a quiet walk in the garden, time to read a book or paint or do what you love. Refer to my video on not losing yourself as an adult. When you feel a general happiness with your life, you won’t be so touchy to others. 

7. Look at the big picture. When you are panicking about society… (and you know I love to panic about society), look at the big picture. I had a lightbulb moment when I was talking to Richard Thompson Ford, the author of Dress Codes. When we were looking at the history of fashion, I decided to be less judgmental about modern dressing sense. I mean, most of it still hurts my eyes, but I have chosen to take a proactive stance on the channel by offering content that can hopefully inspire people to dress better... and that is all I can do. 

 8. If you pray...Pray! – We are not all the same with our spiritual lives, but if you are a person of faith and pray... don't forget to pray when you feel inclined to overreact! You will receive that peace that passes understanding and often get clarity. If you don't pray, do some practice that is meaningful to you that will help you to calm down.

⚜️ What I'm wearing
Rungolee Porto dress code DailyC for free silk face mask
Jackie Mack Designs necklace TDC15OFF for 15% off


Thank you to The Chic Society for bringing us today's video. The Chic Society is the private membership group on YouTube. Membership is only $1.99 a month. I release a "vodcast" (a video podcast) every Friday and we go live (either on YouTube or Zoom) once a month. There are also two upper tiers who receive recognition in The Chic Assignment check-in. 



The Chic Connoisseurs: 
A Better Life with KAT (Flylady Cleaning System), AAM Truthteller, 
Adrienne Cormier, American Blossom Linens, Alexa Moradi, Alison Jennison-Smith, Amy Kennedy,
A Return to Simplicity, A Sparkling Vintage Life, Amy Thibodeaux, Andrea Saavedra, Andrea Andrei,
Angelika Greenhalgh, Angie Helmly, Anny Schreier, Audrey Coyne, BewitchedCrafts.com, Ausra Mewa,
Beata, Bliss Peterson, Brenda Ramsey, Candace V, Cari Leigh, Caroline Logan, Catarina Alexandra, Catherine Huang, Chantal Brinkies, Chelsea Kochevar, Clare's Classroom, Cyndie Lake, Dawn, Deb Reardon, Deni Murrow, Denise Gende, Diana McNease, Elizabeth Doan, Ellie YG, Elizabeth Yang, Efstathia Kositzidou, Freda Masoud, healthywithluba.com, 
Heather Phillips, Helena O, Jackie W, Jane Lynch, Janet Williams, Jasmine Christian, Jeanetta Loubser, Jennifer Fiedel, Jennifer Lamont Leo, Jennifer Timm, jkp62, Judy Moore, Katherine Williams, Kathy Feliciano,  Katie Kolodzy, Kimberly Campbell, 
Lakeisha Bell Cadogan, Lenora Ellis, Liliedaisy, Lois Shank- Retiree, 
Loraine Tadman, Lori Skees, 
Maria Gerlicz-Pogorzelska, Mary Lewis, Marija B. Bingula, Space.For.Home, Marybeth Nelson, 
Megan Lawrence, Melanie Adkins, Melanie Riddle, Mama Mitzey, Maria Gerszewski, 
Melinda Loustalot, Melissa Ricci, Mercy Burton Russell, Michele Kieffer, Michele Pokorsky,
Michelle Henderer, Michelle the Italiagal, Monica F, Monique Egelhoff, Monique Hernandez, Natalie Schultz, 
Not-So Desperate Housewives, Olivia Johnson, Pamela Gunger, Paula Ellis, Paula Johnson, P C, 
Petra Willnecker, 
Raye Cage, Rebecca Faltot, Rita Fernandes,  Rona,  Rosh S., Sandra Light, Sarah Vitsas, 
S.E. Spracher - Author of Chewy Marmot , Scott Rea, Shannon Biddy, Sharon Smith, 
Sheila Hopfensperger, Shelly Cabler aka "The Art of This & That", 
Shelly Kirby, Sonya Sylvester, Stacy Smith, The Simple Swan, Sue Parker, 
Susan Keyes, Tina Grose, Tammy Griffin,  This and That with Denise Jordan, 
Tiki Pié, Tracy The Tea Lady, Veronica Staudt, Wendy Cassara, Wendy Somerville, Wilma Dean, Yen Lee, Zauger, Zuzaienka23


The Elegant Connoisseurs

Amanda Dykes, Author
Amiee Floor, Azalia Spa Goods
Brandi Still, Silhouette Artist
Jenny Williams, Carrot Top Paper Shop
Elaine Brisebois, Certified Nutritionist
Ashley Buffa Freedom Moms Smart Kid Chore System
Nikki Moreno - Inspired by Nikki 
Julie Kolman - My Confident Closet 
Nicole Brignolle - Founder of Lovely Bits
Rosenda Valenzuela - Little Pink Casa 
Mrs. Shockley - A Home for Elegance
The Shortbread Family - Allen's Scottish Shortbread
Mrs. TJ Sturm, Sturm Brothers Jewelry 
Cherish Flieder- Something to Cherish  
Vicel Victoria - JAFRA Beauty Consultant  
Katherine Rae
Carli Thom - Living in Loveliness
Caroline Haydu
Guy Blaise
Isabelle Clabaut
Janice Leitner
Jen Carlson
Jet Rowley-Herron
Jina Kay Kenry
Jenny Candelaria
Juliet Keeler-LeBien
Linda Eklof
Marie Caudill
Maria Conder
Melissa M
Prudently at Home

News

📍The Chic Assignment is on hold for the month of August as I will be taking a two-week break from YouTube and the blog. We will resume the assignments in September. 

📍Please note: the blog will be under construction and moving to Wordpress very soon. I'll make the announcement with more details as soon as I can. Those of you who get this blog delivered into your email might see a temporary pause in email notifications. Thank you for your patience. 

📍*NEW* The Ten-Item Wardrobe eCourse is newly updated and back online with all new video, text, and new lessons. If you have previously purchased the ten-item wardrobe eCourse, you can access all of the new changes for free.

📍If you are looking for more content, consider becoming a member of The Daily Connoisseur through the MEMBERSHIPS feature. I publish one vodcast every Friday and do one livestream or zoom call once a month. It only costs $1.99 a month. There are also upper tiers available for people who are interested in supporting the channel on a higher level and receiving monthly mentions in the videos. 

On Instagram
The Madame Chic Books on Instagram...
Comment of the Week
Titus2Woman writes, "I have to tell you that you have inspired me in so many ways.
I now always use tablecloths I got rid of my very old daily dishes that were chipped and am now using my China as our daily dishes. I just bought new underwear! Thank you Jennifer for the videos you do and all the motivation to always use our best."

Thank you for sharing your testimonial with me. I'm so happy that the blog has inspired you in so many ways.

I hope you enjoyed this latest lesson on Elegance. Let us know how you avoid overreacting and your comment could be chosen as comment of the week on the blog. Have a wonderful day and I'll see you on Thursday!

Love,

Jennifer

NEW* Join The Chic Society on YouTube and become a member of The Daily Connoisseur.


Visit my newly designed Author Website

Shop my Amazon page for a comprehensive list of my favorite things and mentions on the blog.

Facebook facebook.com/JenniferLScottAuthor

Twitter @JL_Scott

Instagram @dailyconnoisseur

Take my affordable eCourses on the POISE *NEW course*, debt-free living, and efficiency at home


FTC: This post is not sponsored.  I use affiliate links, including Amazon affiliate links. Thank you for your support.  
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# etiquette lessons # Finishing School
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